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One Minute Report
November 26, 2003


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Volume VI - #46
U.S. Library of Congress ISSN : 1543-0332

From The Baum Group files
An Exclusive Interview with the Future (Revisited)
by Robert J. Isenberg

We are revisit the future with B. J. (aka RI) to get ready for 2004.

RI: It's a great honor to be talking with you, Mr. Future.

FUT: Please, the Future is fine.  I'm not gender-specific, you know.

RI: Of course.  Now you've earned a lot of attention in recent months,
from around the world.  A lot of people are concerned about what you're
planning in the next millennium.

FUT: That's a little misleading.  People are always worried about what
I've got up my sleeve.  They've been hounding me on the subject for eons.

RI: So being afraid of the Future isn't unusual?

FUT: Fear is pretty standard, yes, but I'm not used to this level of fear.
Nowadays I've got billions on my case.  "Will there be an earthquake?"
"Will you bring pestilence?"  "Are all those prophecies true?"

RI: So, are they right?

FUT: All I can say is this: I'm not a terrorist.  I've been working this job
since the Big Bang, I've never missed a deadline, and I've always tried
to be fair.  I have to provide the universe with a direction, using a little
predestination here, a little Chaos Theory there.  How should I know
if there's going to be a hurricane in the Caribbean next March?  Here
I'm maintaining the whole space time continuum, and people are
asking me about the meteorological patterns on one tiny planet.  For
crying out loud, watch the Weather Channel!

RI: So there's no reason to worry?

FUT: Well I wouldn't go that far.  I'm just saying that people overestimate
me.  I pave the path, and then it's Present that walks on it.

RI: So if something goes wrong, we should blame the Present?

FUT: I think the Present has a tough job, so don't be too hard on it.
But yes, people should think more about the Present, in my opinion.
That's where all the problems are.  And all the virtues, too.

RI: Virtues?

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